You are currently viewing How Grief May Shape Your Holiday Season
  • Post category:Blog

Since before Halloween, artificial Christmas trees and more have been on display in retail spaces. Shopping anywhere you can see the indicators of future festivities. But, in your loss experience, you may not be feeling so festive. 

From my own experience to those I’ve worked with, I’ve learned that the holiday season can feel overwhelming. It can also be fraught with expectations – yours and those of others. It can be downright hard. 

No matter your loss – of a loved one, a job, health, well-being or empty-nesting, the holidays may be daunting. It can be difficult to remember that you have choices. 

This season you can still choose what feels right (or not) for you or your family. Because mourning is exhausting, you can pick and choose what will feel comforting, low stress, peaceful or restful. You can choose knowing that next year you may feel differently. You can chose to commit to less, including baking less or decorating less. You can give yourself permission to do whatever feels most comfortable. 

For some this truly looks like less baking, less gift giving, not doing holiday cards, not attending as many holiday events. It is important to know that when mourning, sounds can feel exaggerated – what you’ve enjoyed before may feel too loud. 

A mourner’s immune system can also be depleted so it may be easier to become ill. It’s okay to give yourself and your health priority. 

Holidays can also carry expectations and high hopes for family gatherings. Others may look to you to take the lead like you always have. It is okay to ask others to step up if they are able. Or to create open conversations around feelings and what’s needed just now. It’s okay to name the fact that things just don’t feel the same. Or that everyone is deeply missing the one who died. 

When it comes to the death of a loved one, you may find yourself longing for familiar foods and traditions. 

It may be comforting to create the meal your loved one loved the most. You and your family might create a baking list around the foods your family member most loved – creating that meal opens the opportunity for memory, shared tastes, scents, and much more. Give yourself permission to experience what feels most comforting. 

Over the coming weeks, we will explore other thoughts and strategies for making new meanings or touching the most meaningful memories through this season. You can also click on the link to the free “Healthy Grieving Tips for the Holidays,” and download strategies to consider. 

Finding a life transition coach can provide you with additional support during and after the holidays. Reach out and sign up for a free 30-minute discovery session to learn more.

A watershed moments coach can come alongside your experience of grief and loss providing support, encouragement, education about the nature of grief and insight that can assist you as you mourn. Collaborating with a coach is an investment in finding your way forward after a significant life change.  Connect with us for a brief introductory conversation where we will explore whether we are a fit for your current grief needs.  Click here to schedule a no-charge, 20-minute conversation where we will learn more about one another.