How to Let Go of the Past: How to Overcome Life's Transitions
I came across this quote in 2021. It resonated with me then. And it continues to resonate with me now. My life, perhaps yours too, has been one long season of change and transitions since 2020. Or perhaps even before that. For me the changes began in 2017 when one of my younger sisters died unexpectedly. That year several people I loved died. I moved to a new home. I began learning how to live my own life at 56. How could it be that I felt I hadn’t lived my own life up until that point?
“Your new life is going to cost you your old one. It’s going to cost you your comfort zone and your sense of direction. It’s going to cost you relationships and friends. It’s going to cost you being liked and understood. But it doesn’t matter. Because the people who are meant for you are going to meet you on the other side. And you’re going to build a new comfort zone around the things that actually move you forward. And instead of being liked, you’re going to be loved. Instead of being understood you’re going to be seen. All you’re going to lose is what was built for the person you no longer are. Let it go.”
Life transitions
Navigating life transitions is hard. It certainly feels like it has a cost. But isn’t the cost of staying where you are – inside your comfort zone and sense of direction – just as costly? Both involve risk and only you can determine your level of risk-ability.
There is so much I appreciate about Wiest’s words. I identify with the idea that I build a life for a person I was in a season – and that I may no longer be that person. That was a particular season that I might label now as “before.” The before included all the ways I lived, worked, and played. It included interests and activities I did in my “free” time. There were things that I enjoyed immensely and took great pleasure in. And, as my life changed and was transformed by the major and minor watershed moments I experienced, some of those activities and interests fell by the wayside. Some have disappeared entirely while others have taken a new shape.
Either way, transitions have a cost.
It wasn’t/isn’t easy moving forward, building a new comfort zone, imagining a different present and future. Sometimes it’s hard. Sometimes it’s fun. And, just as Brianna suggests, what came on the other side of my “after” is way more than I could have imagined. More beautiful, more astounding, more generous, more adventurous, more everything. While some consider it an aftermath, I consider it a healing season. What’s being revealed provides a sense of encouragement that I’m moving in the right direction. Letting go has its own rewards!
Self-coaching Question:
Take some time to journal about cost. What is the cost of making a change in this season of your life? What is the cost of staying where you are?
If this resonates with you, let’s chat!
Contact me to schedule a no-charge, 20 minute conversation where we will learn more about one another. In that conversation you will learn more about my coaching style and experience. I will listen carefully to your needs. Together we will determine if collaborating is the right fit for both of us. Deborah@watershedmomentscoaching.com
