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# Watershed Moments Coaching

My WordPress Blog

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## Posts

- [Awake in the Night](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/08/08/awake-in-the-night/) - Grief has a way of waking me in the night. At first, I might not be aware that it is grief tugging at my mind. It can seem as if something else – a worry, thought, memory is the culprit.
- [Rooted Like the Tree](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/07/30/rooted-like-the-tree-2/) - When we moved into our Arizona home, we discovered a lemon tree in an obscure corner of the yard. At the time, it was full of green lemons. So, we waited. But it was growing over the fence and overhanging the neighbor’s path out of his yard.
- [There is a First Time for Everything](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/08/01/there-is-a-first-time-for-everything/) - Recently, I’ve spoken to two different groups about the idea that we are always having experiences for the first time. I, for one, forget this. Often.
- [How are you doing?](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/03/07/how-are-you-doing/) - How are you doing? I don’t mean in the superficial, “I’m fine” sort of way. I mean in the deep-down nitty-gritty sorts of ways. For many, things have changed. Wildfires, flooding, job loss, diagnoses and health issues, and significant life changes that have brought grief to new levels.
- [Addressing the Grief of Job Loss](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/03/14/addressing-the-grief-of-job-loss/) - I’ve watched in horror as so many people have lost their federal jobs. Then in a true ripple effect, more people have lost their jobs to funding that has been eliminated. The next layer beyond that are people who no longer have business they counted for the upcoming year’s income.
- [A Little Help](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/03/21/a-little-help/) - Grief brings us into new encounters with ourselves and others. My own losses taught me that I wasn’t very good at asking for or accepting help. In fact, I rarely asked for help at all – instead trying to muscle through my loss experiences with willpower alone. Slowly, I learned that it didn’t have to be that way. In fact, there were people around me who wanted to help.
- [Changes at Any Stage of Life](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/04/04/changes-at-any-stage-of-life/) - It turns out, aging comes with all kinds of change. From sagging skin to wrinkles, to eyesight, and mobility changes, to health diagnosis large and small – all happening and needing attention. Many of the changes carry loss within them.
- [Rock and a Hard Place](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/04/11/rock-and-a-hard-place/) - I was recently praying about a difficult decision someone I love is facing. There are two obvious choices at hand. Both choices are beautiful, rich, and exciting. In this moment, even such rich choices feel difficult because they involve change, risk, something new, possible loss, and challenges. As a result, it is hard to know which direction to go. In fact, it is agonizing, uncertain, and uncomfortable being in this position.
- [Speaking and Listening In](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/04/18/speaking-and-listening-in/) - I have a long relationship with public speaking. I’ve spoken as a historical interpreter in a living history museum, zoo educator in two different zoos, and in all kinds of educational settings. I’ve been the primary speaker at funeral services where I’ve had the privilege of telling a life story. Most recently, I’ve spoken in churches and organizations about bereavement, grief, and loss.
- [Why We Gather: Funeral Experiences](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/04/28/why-we-gather-funeral-experiences/) - Do you remember the first funeral you ever attended? Pause for a moment and think about that experience. Take into consideration your age at the time as well as the person being remembered by this ceremony. What was memorable about it?
- [When Grief Goes Public](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/05/02/when-grief-goes-public/) - Whether you are Catholic or not, you may find yourself touched by Pope Francis’s death. The impact of his service as Pope was far reaching – touching the lives of people all over the world. Not just Catholics – but those he championed across significant social issues.
- [What to Know About Attending Your First Funeral](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/05/09/what-to-know-about-attending-your-first-funeral/) - Many people reach adulthood before they attend a funeral. Funerals can feel intimidating even under the best of circumstances. Here are some things to remember about a funeral, celebration of life or memorial service.
- [Is Your Life Speaking?](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/05/16/is-your-life-speaking/) - Is Your Life Speaking? Recently I’ve been rereading Parker Palmer’s Let Your Life Speak: Listening to the Voice of Vocation. Published in 2000, I’ve probably read this small, thoughtful book more than 20 times. While it has its original dust jacket, it is dog-eared, the spine it broken and it is a bit raggedy.
- [Rooted Like the Tree](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/05/23/rooted-like-the-tree/) - When we moved into our Arizona home, we discovered a lemon tree in an obscure corner of the yard. At the time, it was full of green lemons. So, we waited. But it was growing over the fence and overhanging the neighbor’s path out of his yard.
- [Creating Safe Harbor at Home](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/05/30/creating-safe-harbor-at-home/) - If I were to write my own “breaking news” story, it would be this. One of the places where I’ve not felt safe is when I’m mourning. After a major loss, can seem as if everything is lost – not just the loss of the one who died.
- [What Criticism Says About Us](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/06/13/what-criticism-says-about-us/) - How easy it is these days to criticize. Often, I’m guilty of this – jumping in and commenting or sharing my observations about someone or something when it really doesn’t contribute anything or simply isn’t kind.
- [Grief is a Personal Experience](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/06/20/grief-is-a-personal-experience/) - The end of my first marriage was followed closely by the sudden death of one of my younger sisters. It was a hard experience, these two losses back-to-back. An actual death loss and an ending of something that had been a part of my life for 28 years.
- [Divorce is Hard](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/06/27/divorce-is-hard/) - It doesn’t really matter if you are the one asking for the divorce or responding to the request for one, it is hard. I’ve learned that it also doesn’t matter how long you were together before the divorce. Getting a divorce is choosing an ending.
- [Garden Mind: It’s About Change](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/07/04/garden-mind-its-about-change/) - In the past, this would have been a project I would have tackled myself. Cutting them down, getting rid of the debris, weeding around them and then digging in new plants. But. The ground here in the desert is completely different. First, its hard and rocky. My trusty shovel has a hard time making a dent in it. Second, the current plants are watered by a tiny spaghetti system of water lines. I don’t know a thing about these lines. Finally, I don’t know much about desert plants either.
- [Someone Beloved Has Died](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/07/11/someone-beloved-has-died/) - Years ago, I worked for a summer camp located in Kerrville, Texas. I served on the administrative team that worked year-round. Every summer, though, I witnessed the exciting, rewarding, and impactful work of the camp.
- [Aging, Loss, and the People Who Help Us Through](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/07/18/aging-loss-and-the-people-who-help-us-through/) - Recent events have gotten me thinking about aging. Perhaps because what we thought the future would be is changing so rapidly. People I know have expressed concerns about their experiences of aging in the face of new uncertainties.
- [Embracing Change](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/02/27/embracing-change/) - Collectively, we are experiencing so much change. The world around us, the environment, our communities, inside our own families – all of these places are spaces for change.
- [Loss of Stability: Divorce in the Workplace](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/02/14/loss-of-stability-divorce-in-the-workplace/) - While we often think grief is about the death of a loved one, there are other difficult life circumstances that create a deep sense of loss. Divorce is top among those experiences.
- [Life Lessons from the Wilderness](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/01/31/life-lessons-from-the-wilderness/) - I’ve always thought outdoor spaces have something to teach us about vulnerability, loss, recovery and renewal. It was in the barn, backyard, woods, and fields of my childhood where I learned these valuable life lessons.
- [Silent Symptoms of Loss](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/01/24/silent-symptoms-of-loss/) - There are many qualities and characteristics in the journey of loss. Sadness, regret, confusion, anger, doubt and remorse among them.
- [Where's the Smoke](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/01/17/wheres-the-smoke/) - The sky outside my window is completely gray. To say it is overcast would be an understatement. In a place where the sun shines every day, these overcast skies feel particularly oppressive.
- [Calendar Courage and the Power of Paper](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/01/10/calendar-courage-and-the-power-of-paper/) - I still use a paper calendar. Even though I keep up with my Google calendar when scheduling or organizing, there’s just something about my paper calendar. (I know I’m dating myself here).
- [Power Outages in Life and Nature](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2025/01/03/power-outages-in-life-and-nature-5/) - When was the last time you experienced a power outage? Living in a wooded area in central Indiana, power outages where a very real possibility. Wind and ice could bring down limbs or whole trees and with them take out the power lines.
- [Power Outages in Life and Nature](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/01/03/power-outages-in-life-and-nature-4/) - For weeks now, the holiday season has been getting attention. From extended “Black Friday,” sales to the opportunities to attend special musical events, it is all around us.
- [Power Outages in Life and Nature](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/01/03/power-outages-in-life-and-nature-3/) - In the rush of daily life, it’s easy to lose track of what brings us joy and fulfillment. This exercise invites you to make a list of your top 50 favorite things to do, reflect on how often you engage in them, and explore what really matters to you.
- [Power Outages in Life and Nature](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/01/03/power-outages-in-life-and-nature-2/) - So many things these days stretch our energy and attention. Following a national election, for instance. Or the unfolding weather catastrophes that have impacted so many.
- [Power Outages in Life and Nature](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/01/03/power-outages-in-life-and-nature/) - So many things these days stretch our energy and attention. Following a national election, for instance. Or the unfolding weather catastrophes that have impacted so many.
- [Season of Comfort: Finding Joy in Simple Rituals](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/12/27/season-of-comfort-finding-joy-in-simple-rituals/) - For weeks now, the holiday season has been getting attention. From extended “Black Friday,” sales to the opportunities to attend special musical events, it is all around us.
- [A Pictures Worth](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/12/20/a-pictures-worth/) - There’s an old saying that a picture is worth a thousand words. I think there is truth in that saying. For instance, on my desk are some dear pictures of my mom as a girl.
- [The Life Rope: Connecting Past to Present During Change](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/12/13/the-life-rope/) - On the windswept prairies of the 1800’s white-out snowstorms could make life dangerous. Conditions could completely block the view from the back door to the barn door – leaving farmers in danger of losing their way in the white out and bitter cold.
- [How Grief May Shape Your Holiday Season](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/12/06/how-grief-may-shape-your-holiday-season/) - Since before Halloween, artificial Christmas trees and more have been on display in retail spaces. Shopping anywhere you can see the indicators of future festivities. But, in your loss experience, you may not be feeling so festive.
- [What’s Your Compass? Finding Guidance in Uncertain Times](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/11/29/whats-your-compass-finding-guidance-in-uncertain-times/) - Whenever I see the compass, I think of my sister’s hands holding it as she backpacked, kayaked, and canoed the McKenzie River in Canada. She and a friend took on this massive adventure in the summer of 2004.
- [How to Reclaim Your Energy](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/11/22/how-to-reclaim-your-energy/) - So many things these days stretch our energy and attention. Following a national election, for instance. Or the unfolding weather catastrophes that have impacted so many.
- [Grief’s Complexity: Sadness, Comfort, and Legacy](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/11/15/griefs-complexity-sadness-comfort-and-legacy/) - Our experiences of grief and loss can be confusing. Grief can bring on feelings of sorrow, uncertainty, and regret. When we think of our loved one, we may also discover feelings of tenderness and comfort. Sadness and gladness can be present at the same time.
- [Grief and Transformation: A Path Forward](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/11/08/grief-and-transformation-a-path-forward/) - Losses come in all shapes and sizes. No matter what, when they arrive on our doorstep, something changes.
- [A New Perspective: Trusting Life’s Closed Doors](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/11/01/a-new-perspective-trusting-lifes-closed-doors/) - Watershed moments…places where something pushes you into the turbulence of change can lead to important new discoveries.
- [Go Big or Go Home](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/10/25/go-big-or-go-home/) - Several years ago, I was in another city attending the funeral of a friend’s parent. I had recently been through the loss of a sister and a divorce so losses and changes were heavy on my heart.
- [Facing 'On This Day' Pictures During Grief and Healing](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/10/18/facing-on-this-day-pictures-during-grief-and-healing/) - The One Drive Photo Gallery often emails me pictures of memorable moments “on this day.” Some days I love getting these pictures – being reminded of people, animals, experiences, and places dear to me. Other days these photographs remind me of more challenging moments from the past.
- [Life’s Turning Points: Navigating Autobiographical Moments](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/10/11/lifes-turning-points-navigating-autobiographical-moments/) - In his book Life is in the Transitions, author Bruce Feiler writes about autobiographical occasions. He defines these occasions as “moments when we are encouraged or obliged to reimagine who we are.
- [Finding Fun Again After Life Transitions](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/10/04/finding-fun-again-after-life-transitions/) - What do you do for fun? Fun can feel elusive. When we are going through hard things, it can be difficult to identify what fun is. We may have known fun activities before the big changes or transitions in our lives, but fun can also feel as if it disappears in the face of adversity.
- [Make Your List, Live Your Life: How to Align with What You Love](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/09/27/make-your-list-live-your-life-how-to-align-with-what-you-love/) - In the rush of daily life, it’s easy to lose track of what brings us joy and fulfillment. This exercise invites you to make a list of your top 50 favorite things to do, reflect on how often you engage in them, and explore what really matters to you.
- [Body Inventory: How to Tune Into Your Physical Needs](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/09/13/body-inventory-how-to-tune-into-your-physical-needs/) - I almost canceled my upcoming massage. I thought to myself, I feel pretty good so maybe I don’t need it. It seemed in the moment, that it would be easy to forgo this means of taking good care of my body.
- [Taking a Time-Out to Process Your Feelings](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/09/20/taking-a-time-out-to-process-your-feelings/) - The practice of inviting children into a space for a “time out” began about the time I was teaching preschool. Intended as a strategy to address a child’s behavior and feelings, it involved moving the child to a quiet place outside the mainstream activities in a classroom.
- [Out of the Muck, Onto the Dock: The Need for Support](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/09/06/out-of-the-muck-onto-the-dock-the-need-for-support/) - The last time I went kayaking, I had a bit of trouble getting back on the dock. In my defense, I wasn’t using my own kayak, the dock was higher than the boat and it was awkward.
- [When Death Inspires Life](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/08/30/when-death-inspires-life/) - Death losses are sad and hard and they often bring us into acute awareness about the life we are living. Death losses bring to light how fragile and brief life is.
- [The Healing Power of Creativity](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/08/23/the-healing-power-of-creativity/) - In challenging seasons, creativity can be THE thing that helps you move forward or grow through the experiences. What gets your creative juices flowing?
- [Olympic Efforts in Everyday Life](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/08/09/olympic-efforts-in-everyday-life/) - Like lots of people, I watched the Olympics. The athletes, their skill, years-long dedication to their sport, their enormous efforts have been front and center. From all over the world, they’ve gathered to compete as well as represent.
- [Feeling the Feelings](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/08/16/feeling-the-feelings/) - People who are grieving often apologize to me about their tears or strong emotions. Why do any of us do that? Because it is vulnerable when our feelings bubble up out of our eyes and roll down our cheeks.
- [Quiet Your Mind: Steps to Overcome Overdrive](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/07/26/quiet-your-mind-steps-to-overcome/) - I don’t know about you, but my mind has been running on her gerbil wheel. There are so many things happening in the world – and sometimes it’s hard to turn off my messy mind.
- [Discovering New Friends and Cherishing the Old](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/08/02/discovering-new-friends-and-cherishing-the-old/) - Last fall I wrote about the necessity to mindfully choose who our friends are. At times, this means identifying and creating boundaries around friendship. (Hard and sad).
- [Time to Check In: Addressing Unseen Grief](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/07/19/time-to-check-in-addressing-unseen-grief/) - Do you ever have one of those days? One where you feel unbalanced, distracted, discouraged, or even a tiny bit lost? You may find yourself so distracted that you move from one project to another without completing a thing and feel like you are wasting time.
- [From Undone to On Track: Embracing Change](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/07/05/from-undone-to-on-track-embracing-change/) - With so many things happening in the world, in our communities, and in our own lives, it can be hard to focus. Our attention is pulled in different directions. Our hearts are sometimes undone by it all.
- [Holding Grief Lightly: Embracing Life's Losses](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/06/28/embracing-lifes-losses/) - I’ve been thinking lately about the ways in which I’ve come to understand the necessity of holding grief lightly. The world and our daily lives are filled with losses. Losses that are personally profound, heartbreaking, wild, and unruly.
- [Reimagining Summer](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/06/14/reimagining-summer/) - Do you remember returning to elementary school after what seemed like an endless summer. Perhaps your new teacher asked you to write or speak about what you did over the summer months.
- [The Value of Time in Life Transitions](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/06/07/the-value-of-time-in-life-transitions/) - I’ve been thinking a lot lately about time. About how our culture describes time to us. Language like “I’m pressed for time.” “I need to make time to…” “I’m short on time.” “I ran out of time.” “What a waste of time.”
- [Summer of Release: Finding Freedom in Letting Go](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/05/31/summer-of-release-finding-freedom-in-letting-go/) - If I were to write about what I did last summer, it would be titled something like “Let Go.” I spent the summer months last year sorting years of flotsam. I thought I had already done this before I moved in 2017 – when I left my home but also helped sell my sister’s house.
- [Lessons from the Hive](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/05/24/lessons-from-the-hive/) - Scientifically, a bee hive is a single living organism. Yet, inside the hive, there are hundreds of individuals, all with important “jobs” that help support the overall health of the organism.
- [The Gift of Listening](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/05/17/the-gift-of-listening/) - I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the power of listening. About what it means to be listened to – particularly when we are going through changes. About what it means to be a good listener, too.
- [Rattlesnake Spring Awakening](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/05/10/rattlesnake-spring-awakening/) - My first spring in Arizona was filled with natural surprises. Even as I miss a Midwest garden of daffodils, lilac and hydrangeas, I’m startled by the beauty and glory visible in a desert spring.
- [How Losing My Parents Transformed My Life](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/05/03/how-losing-my-parents-transformed-my-life/) - I recently came across a picture of my parents and me. We are standing on the front porch of our extended family’s lake cottage. It was taken a year before my father’s death.
- [Navigating the Wake of Change](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/04/26/navigating-the-wake-of-change/) - Navigating the Wake of Change: How to Steer Through Life's Turbulent Waters. For a season in my life, I kayaked on a river near my home. I loved being on the water – floating at times with the current or pushing my kayak upstream with my energy.
- [Welcoming Grief and Gratitude in Family Traditions](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/04/19/welcoming-grief-and-gratitude-in-family-traditions/) - n my family, everyone was welcome. We opened our home and welcomed international exchange students. Extended family events were all-inclusive and, in some instances, come as you are.
- [Selfish or Self-Care](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/04/12/selfish-or-self-care/) - We live now in an as-its-happening world. Because of the internet, we have 24/7 access to information of all kinds. From environmental disasters to bridges tumbling down to wars around the world to incidents much closer to home, this kind of information access feels full of uncertainty. Its constant nature can give us a sense of
- [Healing Our World From Environmental Grief](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/04/05/healing-our-world-from-environmental-grief/) - As a child, I was often told to “go outside.” That meant finding something to do in our backyard or with other kids who lived in my neighborhood. On the small farm we moved to, it meant exploring pastures, climbing trees, and spending time in a nearby creek. I rode ponies, hiked, swam in a
- [Showing Up](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/03/29/showing-up/) - Lately, I’ve had my head and heart in all things grief. I’ve been studying, reviewing, and preparing for some upcoming presentations. I’ve been reading and re-reading some of my most valuable resources. I’ve also been watching the unfolding health crisis of a loved one from afar. While there is fear, sadness, and scariness attached to this
- [Awakening to Life After Loss](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/03/22/awakening-to-life-after-loss/) - One of the biggest surprises of a death loss is the overwhelming sense of loneliness that follows. It doesn’t matter who died, your loss may leave you feeling isolated and alone in your grief. Early in your loss experience, it can be normal or even helpful to rest in the challenging feelings you are living. It
- [Burnout, Grief, and Recovery](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/03/08/burnout-grief-and-recovery/) - Author Rachel Naomi Remen writes: “We burn out not because we don’t care but because we don’t grieve. We burn out because we have allowed our hearts to become filled with so much loss we have no room left to care.” I don’t know about you, but there are days when my heart is bursting with
- [From Dust to Breath](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/03/01/from-dust-to-breath/) - Inhale: I am from dust. Exhale: I return to dust. This is a breath prayer that appeared in the Lenten devotional I’m using this year. As I’ve practiced it in my office, while making lunch and loading the dishwasher, and in line at the grocery, I’m reminded of just how momentary life is. After all, I started as dust
- [Write It Out: The Advantages of Journaling](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/02/23/write-it-out-the-advantages-of-journaling/) - I started journaling in my late teens. Back then, my journal was a place to pour out all my teenage angst. It was where I wrote about my longing, my dreams, my hopes. It was the place where I started working out who I was and what I wanted to be. Little did I imagine that
- [Beginner’s Mind ](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/02/16/beginners-mind/) - I often hear people speak about finding their new normal after a significant loss. What this looks like varies at the individual level. For many, me included, what became my life after my losses looks nothing like the “normal” I had before. I recently read this quote I’d written in some notes to myself. “We can never
- [Hurry Up World ](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/02/09/hurry-up-world/) - We live in a hurry-up world. Everything moves faster each year. Advances in technology, the availability of information, and the ways we interact with our world and one another are constantly changing. As our world has sped up, so have our expectations. When it comes to grief and loss, we have even higher-speed expectations for ourselves and
- [Closet Cleaning](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/02/02/closet-cleaning/) - I remember a time when I had a recurring dream of cleaning out my closet. In the dream, I sorted out clothing, shoes, and jackets I no longer needed. I put them in a bag for donation. Then I woke up. I never delivered those metaphorical donations in the dream. I never seemed to finish the
- [Baggage or Luggage](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/01/26/baggage-or-luggage/) - “Looking for a glimmer of hope, we have followed a star to get here.Now after a long journey, we set our baggage down.” From Epiphany Sunday Worship at Mountain View Presbyterian Church, Arizona This line from Sunday’s church bulletin really struck me. The words “…after a long journey, we set our baggage down” caught my heart. As I
- [Surprising Relations](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/01/19/surprising-relations/) - Watershed moments often result in changed relationships. Some of my watershed moments have come because of significant losses such as death or divorce. In the aftermath of these losses, relationships changed or disappeared completely. These collateral losses were staggering. Looking back, though, I also found them to be profoundly important. Important because they opened the
- [When Relationships Change](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/01/12/when-relationships-change/) - Last week I wrote about ending toxic relationships in my life. This was and is a very difficult thing. Ending them was both hard and sad. Even when I know that endings are sometimes the healthiest thing I can do, I continue to feel sadness and the fullness of loss. Ending relationships is another layer of
- [Unsolicited Advice](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2024/01/05/unsolicited-advice/) - What happens when someone gives us unsolicited advice? It turns out that when we are in liminal spaces where great personal changes are unfolding, others may offer their opinions about our process or decisions. Has this ever happened to you? I had this experience recently. It was quite painful. The words spoken to me were not supportive, rather they were judgmental. Critical. Hurtful. Questioning and second guessing my decisions. I totally regretted being vulnerable with the person who spoke so harshly of what I was going through.
- [Resolutions](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/12/29/resolutions/) - According to the Oxford Dictionary, a resolution is a firm decision to do or not do something. As one year ends and another begins it can feel like a time to make a New Year’s resolution. Traditionally, resolutions have been made in the arena of health and fitness. A resolution in the coming year is
- [Women's Collective Unity](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/12/22/womens-collective-unity/) - I have been thinking a lot lately about gatherings of women. Women have a history of caring collaboration that stretches backwards across the centuries. These traditions include safe spaces where women supported and encouraged one another.
- [Creativity Fuel](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/12/15/creativity-fuel/) - Creativity has been on my mind a lot lately. I think creativity is essential and it also the thing that gets left behind when we are stressed. Creativity can enable us to step outside our present situation and consider new options. If we can tap into our creativity, we can better respond to situations rather than
- [Grief and Gratitude ](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/12/08/grief-and-gratitude/) - Watershed moments often start with hard situations. It can be challenging, amid loss, to feel as if there’s anything for which to be grateful. Something terrible is unfolding. You find yourself with a diagnosis, or at the bedside of a loved one, or making difficult decisions about care for someone or traveling through a divorce. So,
- [Transitions through the seasons ](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/12/01/transitions-through-the-seasons/) - As autumn slowly draws us into winter here in North America, I am reminded of the beautiful gingko tree in my front yard. As the days shorten its lovely, thick green leaves turn a uniform yellow golden color. The tree is truly stunning. The fall color daily reminds me that the tree will soon be
- [Every Loss Matters ](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/11/24/every-loss-matters/) - Recent weeks have left many of us reeling. The world is in tatters as we watch events unfold. Countries are at war; the climate continues to respond with extreme events, and no one is safe from gun violence. Or at least not anyone in the United States. Watching the local or national news can leave anyone
- [Just Beyond Yourself](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/11/17/just-beyond-yourself/) - The uncertainties of liminal space are challenging push you beyond yourself. One of the aspects of uncertainty is losing touch with your strengths, gifts, and talents. It can be such an untethered time that your connections to your skills and expertise seemingly disappear. For myself, this has felt like a loss of who I’ve been in
- [Having a Mindful Holiday Season: Reflective Questions](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/11/10/having-a-mindful-holiday-season-reflective-questions/) - Even under more normal conditions, the holiday season can be a bit fraught. In today’s world, families stretch across states or even countries. Touched by difficult circumstances, losses of all kinds, and challenges of living in a changing world, the holiday season can prove stressful. Perhaps it is your first season without someone you love. Or maybe
- [Soothing Strategies](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/11/03/soothing-strategies/) - Lately I’ve been listening to Poetry Unbound with host Padraig O’Tuama. Produced by On Being Studios, it is an immersive exploration of a single poem. Launched in December 2019, each season features wide ranging poems written by diverse poets. Each podcast is brief and beautiful. There are so many ways I find these podcasts soothing. Padraig
- [So, What is Self-care?](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/10/27/so-what-is-self-care/) - The idea of self-care has become a catch phrase in our culture. I feel like I hear it all the time. Yet, I wonder what real self-care is. While a mani/pedi, a good massage or a spa day may be forms of self-care, I think they may not go far enough. Instead I’ve begun to think
- [A Longing for Home](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/10/19/a-longing-for-home/) - Homesick: Longing for home and family while absent from them. Listening to a recent dinner conversation with a high school senior, one of the topics was homesickness. When others at the table went away to college, they didn’t think they would be homesick. They couldn’t wait to leave home. Homesickness was the furthest thing from their
- [Grief Your Way](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/10/13/grief-your-way/) - Grief is such a personal experience. Your own grief experience depends on many factors ranging from the type of loss (death, non-death, divorce, empty nest, change in your health or someone else’s) to details surrounding the loss itself. How you experience your loss depends on whether it was sudden or occurred after many months or even years.
- [Breakdown or Break Out](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/10/06/breakdown-or-break-out/) - Recently I was reading a March 2021 Atlantic Monthly article titled “Bring Back the Nervous Breakdown.” The author, Jerry Useem, reported several intriguing facts about the origins and label ‘nervous breakdown.’ He explains that the nervous breakdown first appeared in a 1901 medical treatise which suggested that a nervous breakdown is a “disease of the
- [How to Listen to Your Body and Stay Hydrated](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/09/22/how-to-listen-to-your-body-and-stay-hydrated/) - Every day we have opportunities to attend to the bodies we live in. Take a few minutes to sit still with your body. Notice your feet touching the floor, your legs and bottom being supported by a chair, your back against the back rest, your head – are you leaning forward? Take an inventory of
- [Life Lessons from Bees](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/09/29/life-lessons-from-bees/) - Inside my beehive, the frames fit together neatly. They create rows of cells to be filled by the resident bees with comb, brood, honey, water, nectar, pollen and of course, baby bees.
- [Embrace Body Connection in Liminal Spaces](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/09/20/embrace-body-connection-in-liminal-spaces/) - Liminal space is the perfect time to connect with your body. During seasons of great change, I’ve noticed that it is easy to live only in your head and not in your body. When I’m in my head alone, I believe I can think my way out of something. And while this might be true in
- [Liminal Spaces: Navigating Life's Thresholds](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/09/07/liminal-spaces-navigating-lifes-thresholds/) - According to betterup.com liminal spaces are like thresholds. They represent times of transition, in-between places in which we find ourselves waiting.
- [How Will You Feather Your Nest?](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2015/11/13/how-will-you-feather-your-nest/) - I wonder if the nest and its original barbed location are a metaphor for life and loss? Loss comes with sharp edges; the pain and sorrow, longing and heartache, the deep sense of absence. And, the protectiveness of taking all the time one needs to sit inside the mystery of the life forever changed.
- [Simple Techniques to Stay Grounded During the Grieving Process](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/07/27/simple-techniques-to-stay-grounded-during-the-grieving-process/) - What grief and those who mourn are consistently teaching me is that this uprootedness can call into question things that have seemed part of our solid foundation. Relationships, church, work and even hobbies can feel as if they no longer “fit” with who we are in the present moment. It can seem as if nothing that was of interest is even remotely interesting anymore. It can be hard to stay grounded in an unsteady season of loss.
- [What a World!](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2015/12/11/what-a-world/) - “What a world! What a world!” – The Wicked Witch of the WestIn the movie The Wizard of Oz we’ve all watched the as the Tin Man awakens, the monkeys fly, and the Wicked Witch laments “What a World! What a World!” melts.In recent days, in the face of all that seems challenging and difficult
- [The Grief Diet - Eating After a Loss](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2016/07/25/the-grief-diet/) - The grief diet, the process eating after a loss. What I’ve been reviewing lately is how hard it can be to fix meals in a time of loss and grief. After a long work day, I find myself staring into the refrigerator and freezer and noticing delicious and healthy supplies—and still not being able to
- [Find the Joy in Relocation Transitions](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/07/12/find-the-joy-in-relocation-transitions/) - Recently I watched via social media as friends and acquaintances have made significant life transitions. Recently I watched as friends have made significant life transitions.
- [Self-Care Through Minding Yourself](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2020/05/15/self-care-mind-yourself/) - Last fall I attended a story telling workshop at Pendle Hill Quaker Center for Study and Contemplation. The workshop was led by Irish poet/theologian Padraig O’Tauma. At the beginning of our time together, Padriag told the large circle of attendees that it was our job to mind ourselves.He went on to suggest that minding yourself
- [What Are You Planting for the Future?](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2020/04/29/what-are-you-planting-for-the-future/) - Just like planting seeds, selfcare is an investment in your future well-being. Take the time to nurture yourself and watch the positive effects grow.
- [Seeding Your Future Wholeheartedness](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/06/16/seeding-your-future-wholeheartedness/) - Seeding, Digging, chopping, pulling, pushing—shovel, hoe, pitch fork, wheel barrow. Working in my garden in recent days I began to think about the how much this physical effort is a mirror for grief. Mourning our losses is physically demanding.
- [Transitions Toward Wholehearted Living](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/05/31/transitions-toward-wholehearted-living/) - I came across this quote in 2021. It resonated with me then. And it continues to resonate with me now. My life, perhaps yours too, has been one long season of change and transitions since 2020. Or perhaps even before that. For me the changes began in 2017 when one of my younger sisters died unexpectedly. That year several people I loved died. I moved to a new home. I began learning how to live my own life at 56.
- [Why Unbeautiful Moments Shouldn't Be Ignored](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/06/30/why-unbeautiful-moments-shouldnt-be-ignored/) - “The ability to ask beautiful questions – often in very unbeautiful moments – is one of the great disciplines of a human life. And a beautiful question starts to share your identify as much by asking it as it does by having it answered.” David WhyteWatershed moments are often, in my experience, unbeautiful moments.Rather, they
- [Campfire inspired memories](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2015/10/30/campfire-inspired-memories/) - I love fires; campfires and fires in fireplaces. Some of my fondest memories of childhood include the experiences of fires. I grew up in Girl Scouting—and spent fall weekends camping with my troop where our fire was a key feature of creating "home" away from home. We warmed ourselves by that fire, prepared meals there
- [The Stories We Tell](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2015/11/06/the-stories-we-tell/) - "The man tells his stories so many times that he becomes his stories. They live on after him. And in that way he becomes immortal." - Big Fish Over this past weekend I watched the movie Big Fish. While I won't say anything that might be a spoiler if you haven't seen it, I will
- [A Place Called Between](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2015/12/02/a-place-called-between/) - In his book Life's Journeys According to Mister Rogers, Fred Rogers writes: "I saw a friend who's a freelance writer and asked him what he was working on. "Nothing right now," he answered. "You know how it is with freelancers. But at times like this I tell myself I'm 'between opportunities.' That way I don't
- [What's On Your Plan B List?](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2015/12/17/whats-on-your-plan-b-list/) - In the months after my mom died (nearly 10 years ago) I participated in a grief support group offered by a local hospice facility. One of the takeaways that has stayed with me across the years it to have a plan in advance. That empowering thought—have a plan—enabled me to participate in planning activities, holiday
- [Join Deb Buehler for a 90 minute conversation](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2013/10/22/join-deb-buehler-90-minute-conversation/) - Growing Beyond Grief Join creative grief coach and writer Deb Buehler for a 90 minute conversation about the potential for turning personal loss into wholehearted living. Poetry, words, pictures, listening and sharing are some of the elements of Deb's creative toolkit for exploring loss. It will be an opportunity to consider the question of what
- [How Liminal Spaces Can Help You Transform Your Life and Overcome Challenges](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2023/05/21/how-liminal-spaces-can-help-you-transform-your-life-and-overcome-challenges/) - What is a liminal space? It can be defined as a threshold, the place between one time or season and the beginning of another.
- [In physics a moment is a turning affect produced by a force acting at a distance on an object.](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2022/05/24/in-physics-a-moment-is-a-turning-affect-produced-by-a-force-acting-at-a-distance-on-an-object/) - A turning affect. So many moments in my life have had a turning affect. They have caused me to turn from the direction I thought I was following and move into a completely different flow. I’ve learned that changes in the flow of life call for resilience, clarity and wholehearted curiosity toward what might be
- [A woman in harmony with herself is like a river flowing. – Maya Angelou](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2022/05/24/a-woman-in-harmony-with-herself-is-like-a-river-flowing-maya-angelou/) - I live near the White River in Indianapolis, Indiana. I cross it on my drive to and from the grocery. I regularly walk a trail with two bridges across the river. I’ve watched the river in all seasons…when it becomes a roaring, rushing torrent swollen, brown and fast moving after rain. Whole trees get caught
- [Watershed World](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2022/05/24/watershed-world/) - All of us have been or are experiencing watershed moments. There is no doubt that all that is happening in our world, our communities, and families is being impacted by the events around us. So many things seem to be happening at once…. sometimes too fast for us to even process. In this weary watershed
- [Missing Mom](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2014/02/19/missing-mom/) - Juncos have been eating at my backyard bird feeders since early December. My mom always said the juncos meant snow was coming. And this winter, true to form they've been here with the snow. But it is moments like this—the first sighting of juncos or the return of gold finches and hummingbirds in spring that
- [Everything is Changed](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2014/02/05/everything-changed/) - "A death has occurred and everything is changed by the event. We are painfully aware that life can never be the same again,.." The opening words of a poem by Paul Irion were shared during the funeral celebrant training I attended in January. As they were read by trainer Glenda Stansbury I was struck by
- [Ready to Write Your Story?](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2014/01/28/ready-write-story/) - A new semester of Indy Women Writing for a Change is about to begin. Classes are designed to provide a safe and supportive space for women who want to explore their writing voice. Women are encouraged to tell their stories in whatever written form they wish to pursue, whether it is fiction, poetry, journal, essay
- [Companioning](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2013/11/20/companioning/) - While dining out with family, I was inadvertently part of a larger, unfolding drama. The restaurant was filled with people and bustling with activity. Wait staff members were carrying meals to tables, delivering beverages or clearing tables for another seating. Meanwhile people of all ages were gathered for a Friday evening out. Suddenly paramedics rushed
- [Love, Loss and the Holidays [WORKSHOP]](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2013/11/18/love-loss-holidays-workshop/) - The holiday season can be challenging even under the best of circumstances. After a loss, the holidays can seem daunting. Join in a conversation exploring resilience during the holiday season. Together we will uncover strategies for making the holiday season about more than simply surviving. Through music, poetry, writing and ritual, participants will consider intentional
- [Boxes of Joy](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2013/11/13/boxes-joy/) - I was just plain homesick when the box arrived in San Antonio, Texas. It was big, and very, very light. I couldn't imagine what it contained. There it was, waiting for me after work on the front steps. A large shipping box that was easy to move. Since it was addressed to both Craig and
- [Dia de los Muertos/Day of the Dead](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2013/10/30/dia-de-los-muertosday-dead/) - As the end of October approaches, I consider what it means to create an ofrenda. In the Latin American tradition of Dia de los Muertos, an ofrenda is an altar that is created to remember and honor beloved family and friends who have died. While the rituals on this day may vary from graveside shrines
- [Autumn Arrives](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/2013/10/16/autumn-arrives/) - This year, autumn has been slow to arrive in the Midwest. It is mid-October and still feels like September. Trees have barely begun to change and the grass remains green and in need of cutting. Again. This slow, leisurely change reminds me that all changes have their own natural timing. In his work with grief

## Pages

- [Home](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/) - Steering through watershed moments takes intention, fortitude, endurance, and a ton of energy. As a Watershed Moment Coach, I companion clients through change with mindful listening, creative encouragement, accountability, and brainstorming support. Together we become co-collaborators as you identify your vision, purpose and intentions for the days, weeks and months ahead. We talk through possible
- [Services](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/services/) - As a life transitions coach, I serve as a creative resource for threshold experiences so that clients can live with authenticity and a deeper sense of self. Coaching is a co-creative and collaborative process. I provide mindful listening and questioning, compassionate consideration of your journey, and the wisdom of process skills towards change. I strive to
- [A Compassionate Guide for Planning a Funeral](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/planning-a-funeral/) - Clarity, Support, and Compassion — Exactly When You Need It The days following a death are some of the hardest you’ll ever face. Grief pulls at your heart while details demand your attention. Suddenly, you’re asked to make choices about funeral homes, services, and paperwork — when all you really want is space to grieve.This
- [Checkout](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/checkout/) - You’re taking a meaningful step in a difficult moment. This guide is here to support you through the practical decisions that come after a loss.You can move through it at your own pace, returning to it whenever you need.
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- [Deb Speaks](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/deborah-brandt-speaks/) - “Stories make us more alive, more human, more courageous, more loving.” – Madeleine L’Engle Across my career, I’ve been a speaker and story connector. I’ve spoken to audiences of all ages on topics from the environment to grief and loss. It is always a privilege to be invited to speak with congregations and organizations as
- [Resources](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/resources/) - Resources for Those Who Are Grieving and Those Who Love Them The Geography of Loss: Navigating Your Personal Terrain of Grief ,Patti Digh Unattended Sorrow: Recovering from Loss and Reviving the Heart, Stephen Levine Death Benefits: How Losing a Parent Can Change an Adult’s Life – For the Better, Jeanne Safer, Ph.D A Grace Disguised, Jerry Sittser Companioning the
- [Contact](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/contact/) - Name(Required) First Last Email(Required) Message(Required) Connect with me for a brief introductory conversation where we will explore whether we are a fit for your current grief needs. Click here to schedule a no-charge, 20-minute conversation where we will learn more about one another. SCHEDULE HERE
- [Meet Deb](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/meet-deb/) - “Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” ~ Mary Oliver After a series of watershed moments – divorce, the death of a younger sister, and deaths of five others dear to me all in one year, I felt myself face to face with my own mortality.
- [Packages](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/packages/) - Initial Consultation No Charge Recent years and events have left many people questioning their own place in the world. Losses abound and for some, this is a time of redefining and reflection on what is most important now. The changing times, all the losses of recent years and the present moment in our culture and
- [Education and Workshops](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/education-and-workshops/) - With more than 30 years of public speaking and presentation development experience Deb offers custom workshops, presentations and trainings to meet the needs of diverse audiences.A gifted storyteller, Deb has presented a wide variety of educational content throughout her career. She brings presentation and education skills, expertise and knowledge about content such as grief in
- [Grief Coaching: Every Loss Matters](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/grief-coaching-every-loss-matters/) - Recent years have brought waves of significant losses. Too many to name, they beckon for attention. Our losses are sometimes like a wild rabble tugging on our sleeves. Whatever the losses, they may need caring companionship to decrease their intensity.As a creative grief coach, Deb practices a model of companionship. She honors the feelings as
- [Health & Wellness Coaching](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/health-wellness-coaching/) - Watershed moments can challenge and affect our overall health and wellness. Change challenges the practices we may have done to stay healthy. Sometimes when changes are fast and furious, our own individual health care can take a back seat to more important needs and decisions.While counterintuitive, staying focused on our overall health and wellness can
- [Blog](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/blog/) - Blog Awake in the Night Grief has a way of waking me in the night. At first, I might not be aware that it is grief tugging at my mind. It can seem as if something else – a worry, thought, memory is the culprit. August 8, 2025 Blog There is a First Time for

## Downloads

- [A Compassionate Guide for Planning a Funeral Digital](https://www.watershedmomentscoaching.com/downloads/a-compassionate-guide-for-planning-a-funeral-digital/) - Digital A Compassionate Guide for Planning a Funeral a calm, clear guidance during the early days after a loss. Written by funeral celebrant Deborah Brandt, this guide helps families navigate the practical steps of planning a funeral while honoring the life of their loved one with care and meaning.

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